Community - We are not alone

I just hung up from today's Skype date and immediately felt a sense of relief. Having missed October's Skype I was feeling quite isolated and removed from this whole MA process. I have been working through my AOL's, trying to read a few books, and struggling with Blogging and journaling, the whole time feeling disconnected from the process. Having this time to sit and listen to others and hear about their challenges and revelations has me feeling much more connected to this MA community. Although I am an ocean away I know that there are others like me out there! Adesola's comments about the importance of reading and commenting on each others Blogs struck me. I obviously needed the reminder that I am not doing this alone and that as a group we can use each others Blogs and learning experiences to influence our own pathway through this MA - and in turn develop community. This is a very different experience then any other that I have been involved in. My past learning and work environments have always been deeply rooted in community. This MA at first seems very isolating, but I can see now how our Blogs, Linkedin and our Skype sessions can help create the community that I am missing. One day in the near future I hope to pop over to London and come visit you all in person :) In the mean time I am going to make it a priority to stay on top of Blogging so that I continually remind myself that I am not alone in this journey and I am part of something greater.

This past month my mom was in Switzerland at the IADMS conference. While she was there she met some women from the Middlesex dance program who were teaching on Limon technique and aerobics (I hope I have that right). I received a very excited email from her telling me that she had heard rave reviews about Middlesex University, met these women and told them that I was in the MA program. She mentioned that they were also intrigued by our connection with Limon technique. Although I do not know who these women are and may never meet them, my mom's email was another reminder that I am connected to Middlesex, it's faculty and students, even when I feel isolated over here in the snow!

So I have come to a conclusion and I have come up with a mantra… We are not going through this alone, we have each other to help guide the way :)

Strengths

As I have been working on my AOL's I have noticed a theme emerging within my learning. The majority of my learning has come through intuition and my interaction with others. I am aware of my natural ability and desire to relate to, guide, and mentor both peers and students. I can not point exactly to where in my past experiences I gained these skills, but I do believe I was born with an inclination towards personal connection and can see that it has been nurtured throughout my life. When I reflect on my work experience since University, I am now realizing how mature a lot of my responsibilities were. I was thrown into my work as an Artistic Director, and although I did have people to guide me when needed, I really did have to create the role myself. I was in charge of 30 young dancers and their families; was responsible for all communication between staff, dancers, and community organizations; creating an annual budget and monitoring expenditures; and most importantly creating a season that was pleasing to all of our stake holders. This was a lot of pressure for such a young director. I think the responsibility of these tasks forced me to mature and grow quicker then I would have without this job. Intuition, the sense of responsibility and the desire to please those involved played a huge role in my decision making and interactions with those around me. At the time I did not realize that these were my some of my strengths. I reflect back on my years in this role and am impressed with what I was able to accomplish and the vast learning that I gained. Sometimes the best way to learn is to jump in with both feet before you really know what you are getting into!
This friend of mine encouraged me to take part in Clifton's Strengthsfinder test online. I was both surprised and not surprised at my results. My strengths fit with me on a personal level, but after reading through the descriptions I was surprised to see their connection with my work experience. I probably shouldn't have been surprised because who I am of course will carry into my work, but I was still taken back by how these strengths make sense of situations that I have been challenged to work through in my jobs over these last few years. My top five strengths are Relator, Harmony, Connectedness, Includer, and Responsibility. 4 out of 5 of these are relationship building strengths, and 1 (Responsibility) is an executing strength. I think I needed to take this test and see these results in order to finally connect my personal self with my work. (If that makes sense?) Through reflecting I can see that for the last few years I have been separating parts of personal self and work self. Looking back I can see times when my strengths played greatly into my work, even though at the time I did not realize that they were my strengths. In my personal life I have always valued building relationships and being a support for those close to me. When I work I am definitely influenced by these attributes, but wonder if I have truly been myself in my work. After taking this test I am eager to start paying attention to how I respond to my different roles with these strengths in mind. Stay tuned!

It's time to start something new!

"And suddenly you know: It's time to start something new and trust the magic of new beginnings."

~ Meister Eckhart ~

I have never written a blog before… never wanted to… never thought I would have to! Yet here I am. This blog is part of the start of something new. And since I am new to all of this, I will use this first blog to explain a bit about myself and how I have come to this "new" place in my life. 

My name is Ainsley Sudds. I live in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. I am a director and dance instructor at Crossings Dance Ministries in Calgary, which is under ownership of my family. I completed a BA Dance from the University of Calgary in 2007 specializing in Modern/Contemporary dance. From there I went on to complete a Professional Studies Program at the Limon Institute in NYC. On returning home to Canada I took on the Artistic Director position for Corps Bara Dance Theatre's Youth Company. For the past 6 years I have had the privilege of directing 20-30 young dancers ages 9-18. These dancers were committed to weekly rehearsals, monthly performances in churches, school and events in Calgary, as well as semi-annual original performances. I was in charge of making this youth company happen! I created an annual budget for the youth company, worked with the staff and Board of directors to compile a full company budget, created all scheduling for rehearsal and performances, hired choreographers, ran rehearsals, organized all elements of production, planned and gathered costumes, helped with fundraising, attended all Board meetings, communicated with churches, schools and other community organizations, and so much more! I loved having the opportunity to mentor and lead these talented and passionate young women for many years. However, all good things must come to an end. 

This past year I began to feel unsettled. My life was completely consumed by my work that I had no "space" for anything outside of it. After an important meeting in June I hit a wall and realized that my life was not going to change unless I made a big change. Instantly the word "space" came to me. I realized that the life I led did not allow any space for new opportunities and in order to make any changes I needed to let something go. For 6 years I had not let this thought come into my head. While I loved my work, I could not continue letting my work consume my life. So I made the decision to leave this organization in order to create space to let new things enter my life.  

With this decision came an immediate sense of relief! Finally I had space in my mind, heart, and life for new things! I had no idea at the time what those new things would be, but I was thrilled to even conceive that something new could be a possibility! Within 24 hours I was on my computer researching. I didn't know what I was looking for, but I was on the hunt! I googled NYC to see if there was anything there of interested. Nothing. I googled ISTD to see if maybe I was to begin the training for my Associate. Nope. I then googled "Master of dance education UK". I love the UK and thought that maybe with all of the great schools in the UK something may be out there of interest. And BOOM there it was. The first to pop up was the MAPP DTP program. I read the home page for the program and was convinced. This all took place on a Thursday evening and by Friday afternoon I had my family and close friends on board with my decision to leave my current job and begin an MA. I took the weekend to sit on this big decision, getting more and more excited as time passed. On Monday I began the processes of leaving my job and applying for the MA. And now here I am... It is time to start something new!

I am still quite confused and nervous about what all this MA will entail, but I look forward to honing in on my teaching and reviewing all that I have learned and experienced since I began my concentrated dance education in 2003. I feel like I will be rusty when it comes to school work, but I know that this time of focus, refreshment, and new challenges will be so rewarding. Taking this time to reflect and focus on my personal growth is much needed at this point in my life. I am also really intrigued to see how this program will translate into my teaching and the effect it will have on my students! I expect great things :) 

I look forward to getting to know everyone more through our monthly Skypes, Blogs and Linkedin!